When God stop
you to come, I’m a little bit happy. I feel that God gave me a little more time.
So one day I can welcome you with a better smile.
Not because I
don’t like you. But, the past is not so easily left behind. The heart that once
I gave you, I’m also not sure if all of them have come back to me or there’s a
part that still left in you.
I don’t mean
to turn you down. I just want you to come slowly. How can I let you to move so
fast while you can’t convince me, not
fully get my heart?
I’ve fallen.....
and I haven’t really recovered. I’m sure you can help me get back up if you
keep trying and never give up.
That’s
why...... I’m sorry.... I’m so
sorry....maybe I was too coward to say
it to you directly. Maybe I’m only a child who still too young. Maybe I can’t
face my own problems properly. I just want you to understand that I’m still in
doubt, and I need a little more time.... Because I also don’t want to hurt you.
Because if you’re keep forcing.... Maybe I would be upset, and make you sad...
But, I know,
waiting is not an easy thing. Therefore, if one day you feel tired, tell me....
I’ll let you go. And..... if you had
left me, I would stop trying too.
Because now, I’m also giving my effort, to accept you one more time...
I don’t know
after this everything is going to be better or worse instead. But of course I
wish us the best. It’s just a letter that I wrote with a sense of guilty. Maybe
after reading this letter you will feel sad or even angry. But, If you texted
me after read this, I would welcome you with a smile. Because I know..... You
must have understood....
